ditzibum

it is months' worth of writing and crying and waking up to realize that all though everyone is around, you are still alone ever since he left, he took not just his clothes and gel and keys and rough hand-packed emotions but your centre too. when he called the cab, it was too late. when he boarded the plane, it was too late. when he arrived home it was too late so you scrambled eyelessly around, looking for your centre with your hands and we kept hushing you to sleep because you wouldn't if we didn't it was painful, everything was colourless, everything was muted, everything was tasteless and had no se

You grew over shrubs and hedges eating quasars like cereal bowls. Something remains porcelain under sadness and requited joy. other things remain so much more. One. today you found love at the back of your palm, growing inwards into your veins and into your heart. you opened your fangs and said some things are just meant to be. Remember him like a midnight rain. Remember him like the ocean or tears or the years you’ve passed in school hallways. he is your solace and you know it. Two. Your coffee friend calls you at 5 a.m. to tell you of maple pecan crunch. of cohen and summer’s separa

This is a whole room of people Moving bodies, useless chatter Lights, sounds, tastes But I am alone. There is someone for everyone I am the outcast, Always has been. Sometimes we wish that there is something more to a book Or a song, a movie But that is all there is to it, Only a book A song, a movie. If I look really closely, I can see tiny dots everywhere. They make up my mind And everything else, for that matter. Cause even the sweetest turns bitter by time We can reveal so much through words But the pain inside, We can’t see We cannot feel. They say hurt is part of mankind But I don’t feel any emotions and

my parents never beat me and look how I turned out: cracked ribs fractured pelvis blood in my urine finally lost my baby teeth but there's no love without blood and you do not dream in hourglasses rusty wind and ferris wheel cages to watch the gauze fall untaped on the kitchen floor and I am itchingscratchingbleeding time profusely and it falls off me like sawdust with every turnaround or shakemyheadno but I still stand still with knees dovetailed and head cocked down to watch the wood shavings pile at my shins like suitcases you always want more so when I felt the fault lines in your wrists start to tremble I took that

once i asked you your favourite colour, and you said, "the brown of your eyes," so i put in one green contact and told everyone that i came out of the womb as a factory defect, half-priced, damaged goods. - sometimes i am from canada and sometimes i am from england and sometimes i am from spain. i've carefully tempered my accents and plotted out my stories with yellow and purple coloured pencils on index cards. my origin changes like the seasons. "why do you lie to everyone?" you ask. "why not?" i reply. - i wear nametags that read "alicia" and "liana" and "samantha," because i want to know how it feels to be someon